Journaling

He is oh so busy lately, sleeping not till 2 am, with work, his mom, lunches, vedic astrology, outings. No time for me, to talk to me.

And the one I live with swings between anger and lust and friendship. I feel tired around his energy.

I want to curl up and sleep a dreamless, content sleep.

I am so aimless, where is this life heading? I want to run away. Start over.

Sadness is creeping over me while I’m waiting for the medicine to do its’ thing.

Much metta to me, to all tonight.

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chemical un-loneliness

Did you know that one little pill can make me happy?

sadmadglad.

little white chemicals, more serotonin in my brain,

less sadness in my heart,

more smiles,

less moments of feeling overwhelmed.

If I forget those little chemicals,

I drop into a pit of depression.

Spinning around with loneliness, aimless, anger, melancholy.

I bought my pill.

I’ll be ok.

I am ok.

I am.

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