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Posts Tagged ‘Nirvana’

I have a little secret desire. No one knows it. No family, no friends, no virtual friends, not my therapist, nor my Dr. I will tell you what it is though, gentle reader. Here it is: I want to melt into oblivion. I want this Life to end, I also want this Death to end, I want it all to end. I am a flawed flawed human being, who does the best she can every moment, every day, and suffers, because in the end it’s my own attachment, my desire to not accept things as they are. Buddha knew. Life has suffering built into it. The origin of suffering is attachment. It is possible to end this suffering. They way to do that is the Eightfold path, a middle way. (no extremism) I’ve been walking that path the best I can, with what capacity I have. I am tired though, I want to lie down under a tree in the shadow, take deep breaths, and merge into nothingness. I want Nirvana, the Ultimate Reality, the True Freedom.

I want to dive from a tall mountain into a valley and disappear, as though I never existed, and never will.

Is suicide another path out?

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I dedicate this human birth to the goal of nirvana.

Oh, suffering, I bow to you today.

You have lead me to seek the ultimate reality.

Nirvana on a householder’s path, nirvana on a renunciate’s path,

two boats rowing toward the same shore.

Been sitting in the first boat, want to sit in the other one now.

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Paths of life

Did the Buddha say that to reach Nirvana, one has to take on the life of a renunciate and become a monk or nun? That is, is it possible, according to the Buddha, to reach Nirvana, be enlightened, while living the life of a householder? I do understand that after one is enlightened, one may live as a householder, or a renunciate, or neither… But I wish to know about the life of a person who is seeking enlightenment and his/her greatest desire is to seek an end to suffering? I imagine the answer is to reach Nirvana, one may either be a householder or a renunciate. Once you reach the other side of the shore, you have no need for the boat. Whether that boat was that of a householder, or a nun, or something else altogether. Yet, I’d like to get this knowledge from those who are experienced and speak with mindfulness.

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